compliment of the day
“you are the queen of snark,” john said.
“thank you,” i said.
why hello pretty girl
i just bumped into shannon in the hallway.
“hello pretty girl did you get a hair cut?”
“no, i just wore it down.”
“it looks good.”
“thanks, i’ve just been so lazy throwing it back in a headband for the past few weeks.”
“yeah, let’s wear it down more often.”
“but i’m lazy.”
“let’s make it a new year’s resolution.”
shannon’s the second [...]
the one where i play the word nazi
“are you sick of my yet,” i asked as i approached her cube for about 294th time that day.
“yes, now what do you want?” she said.
“is it ok if we say compositional here, because compositing isn’t a word.”
“it isn’t?”
“no.”
“can we make it one?”
“umm, no. also composite isn’t a verb.”
“can we make it one.”
“no, we aren’t [...]
working for ebenezer
this afternoon i had to tease julie mercilessly.
“are you like scrooge mcduck or something?” i asked.
“what?”
“c’mon an 8:30 meeting on new year’s eve?”
“well at least you don’t have a 4:30 to 5.”
“but i planned on sleeping in!”
don’t forget it’s monday
not only did i oversleep by like an hour and forget that i needed to fuel up ruby, about half-way to work i realized that i forgot all my work at home and had to turn around. then there was some sort of natural gas leak at the intersection of eden prairie road and pioneer [...]
Read morei turned the page and fell in love
“She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, seperating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prisim through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum,” Jonathan Safran Foer,Everything Is Illuminated
Read moreliterary pet peeve
i’ve spent most of the day lost in the magical world of Everything Is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer. I’m digging the book, but having a hard time getting over my grudge against Foer. i’m more than a little pissed off that he has injected himself into the novel. he’s a main character and i [...]
Read morenaturally gifted
“i’ve watched all my new DVDs already,” he said.
“oh that’s too bad,” i said.
“yeah, it blows,” he said.
“did you know they have these new stores where you can go rent videos and then return them when you are done?”
“ha-ha, did you take a funny class in college?”
“nope, it’s natural!”
rise up and demand what is rightfully ours
ok darling ones, while i’m gone i want you to all visit the lovely ms. heather and while you’re there, demand that she reveal the lyrics to the jodi chromey song she wrote.
Read morefollowing the map
bonnie unearthed a box of godivas that she got as a gift from one of our vendors. she brought the box over here to the treat table sans map.
“where’s the map?” i asked.
“i threw out all the paper work,” she said.
“how are we gonna know what were eating without the map?”
“ok, i’ll get the map.”
she [...]
form of an ice pick
john and sonja have spent like the last 30 minutes talking about war and military history and what not. it’s really sort of amusing, at least the the parts that i was sort of half listening to were amusing.
finally john says, “well, i suppose we better get some work done.”
“you two are so cute [...]
tempted but the truth is discovered
being back at work is painful. i’m tired and want to spend the day lounging about reading and watching soap operas and eating bon-bons. sadly, that’s not meant to be. i have to be here and write stuff.
the only thing making this remotely enjoyable is a caramel mocha. see john ran to caribou and [...]
faintly bouncing around the room
well the bratty-boring loneliness has allowed me to work myself into a full-fledged, woe-is-me, pity party. it’s not pretty. i’m hot, sweaty and my eyes are all red and puffy. but my breathing has returned to normal.
it wouldn’t have been so bad if i weren’t convinced i was gonna die in three weeks. [...]
insert deep, dramatic sigh
i’m bored and lonely. i finally finished the little friend. i’d write about it, but i’m still digesting.
i’ve about 10 new books. but i don’t know which one to start with. i’m sick of cleaning my apartment and i’m not tired.
i’m bratty, bored and lonely. so who wants to come over and play?
gift of the magi
ok, so i didn’t sell my hair to get him a gift. but in an odd bit of christmas magic, the outlaw and i bought each other the same book.
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