alone on the island of misfit toys
things learned while at family christmas event #1 (the first in a three part series):
1. it’s really funny when your aunt janis falls over in her chair and nearly knocks over the christmas tree
2. relatives who pick favorites suck
3. just because they’re related doesn’t mean you have to like them
4. a bottle of wine makes it much easier
5. there is no five
and most importantly
6. if you consistently make fun of the name your sister plans on giving her soon-to-be-born child she will eventually cry and that will make you feel bad
7. no matter how much you say “no no nolan” in a super annoying voice they will not reconsider the name
8. apparently this isn’t some huge practical joke, they really, really like the name nolan
9. they really aren’t kidding about that bad, bad name and so you’d better just keep your dislike of it to yourself
just stumbled into your website and am pouring over it like a novel. you probably get it all the time, but you are a fab writer. i too can quote high fidelity, and would argue that it’s one of the best films ever. again, love the site
22 Dec 03 at 12:30 am #Naming of offspring has become a full contact sport in the U.S. Witness the hyper-proliferation of Tyler and Jacob. Pretentious names suck and it would sure be nice for the parents to wake the fuck up.
Of course this comes from a guy with a girl’s name so maybe I have baggage.
22 Dec 03 at 10:26 am #I snotted myself over #1.
22 Dec 03 at 5:31 pm #That was extremely mean.
23 Dec 03 at 9:20 am #That was extremely mean, making fun of that poor not-yet-born baby’s name.
23 Dec 03 at 9:21 am #yeah, clearly you have no sisters.
23 Dec 03 at 9:27 am #I would agree with you that relatives who pick favorites suck, especially when they’re obvious about it, but I was doing my Christmas cards last night (late, I know) and the aunts & uncles who send gifts to my kids and clearly favor me as a niece were rewarded with larger school-pics and prettier cards…I didn’t mean to do it, but I had only so many of the bigger & better pics to go around, so the aunties who like me better ended up with the nicer pictures of my kids. I suck, I know.
And I like the name Nolan, although it screams trendy.
Happy holidays!
23 Dec 03 at 9:46 am #No, I don’t have any sisters, but I do have a brother and I would have to smack him if he started making fun of the name I had chosen for my child. But I did want to say that I’m glad I discovered your journal. All in all it is quite interesting. You do have some great writing skills.
23 Dec 03 at 3:08 pm #Nolan isn’t my first choice of a name, but it reminds me of Nolan Ryan, and that’s cool.
29 Dec 03 at 5:31 am #