You Are At The Archives for March, 2004

March 31st, 2004

think of me and try not to laugh

the FDA has just announced that greenbag starburst jellybeans and diet coke with lime are the new breakfast of champions. expect to see my face on the bag of jellybeans soon.

March 31st, 2004

even the stars are gonna kick my sad ass into shape

i woke up this morning to a bit chastising from rob brezsney: GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Visualize a scenario in which Israelis and Palestinians are still embroiled in a hateful state of siege for another 100 years. Imagine that the personal problems bugging you now will continue to torment you indefinitely. Live your life as [...]

March 31st, 2004

as if another link is needed

on crying wednesday mornings, i like to read a little dooce (this link is for the completely clueless) to cheer me up.

March 31st, 2004

five for my lonely

it’s been awhile since i cried myself awake. looks to me to about a year or so. but tonight i cried. i haven’t cried like this in a good long time. sure i’ve done my standard crying when reading the newspaper, watching movies, reading books. but i can’t remember the last time i cried such [...]

March 30th, 2004

failed again

i’ve done it again. once again my words have failed me. as i wrote something that i thought would explain how i’m feeling, would tell you where i’m coming from, i was hurting the one person i care for most in this world. my stomach aches with guilt. my eyes brim with anger. when i [...]

March 30th, 2004

lately i’ve been wishing i had one desire

a list before the 3:30. 1. i need to read Why Europeans are getting taller and taller and Americans aren’t. 2. must seriously consider moving to amsterdam 3. i have a stomachache like you wouldn’t believe. i’m not quite sure whether to blame it on the turkeyburger i had for lunch or the fatal combination [...]

March 30th, 2004

i’m a girl mostly made of pain

oh, i’ve got it. i had a dream last night, a beautiful, sad, melancholy dream. i think the dream has washed over the day, tinting it a foggy blue. the dream was so dimestore dream interpreters, have at it.

March 30th, 2004

i’d give me away

i’m wearing a melancholy coat today. i miss the sunshine today. i feel sort of sad about something, though i’m not sure what it is. perhaps it’s just the unbearable weight of my utter loneliness that’s bringing me down. i can’t quite put my finger on it, but i miss the days when i could [...]

March 29th, 2004

the politics of loneliness

my epic battle with loneliness is no secret. unlike what douglas coupland said when i heard him speak back in july, i write about it often. coupland had said that nobody wants to talk about loneliness. it turns people away, freezes them out. i would beg to differ on some level. i think people might [...]

March 29th, 2004

retribution

so the artguy actually invited me to another opening. i guess my performance at the last one wasn’t quite heinous enough to bar me from the invite list. this, it makes me feel good.

March 29th, 2004

whatever colors you have in your mind

i’ve made the official decision that i’m sleeping with the next person to sing “lay lady lay” to me.

March 29th, 2004

have no shame

yesterday i decided to sleep in. i had actually woken up around 8:30 and started the day. but by 9 a.m. i had decided that it would be a good idea to go take a nap. and nap i did, that was until i was rudely interrupted at 10:30 by the phone. it was the [...]

March 29th, 2004

the final countdown

i only have to come to work nine more days until vacation. do you have any idea whatsoever how happy this makes me? in other news, i have discovered that it really pisses me off to no end when someone online questions my gender, even in a joking manner. i have a really hard time [...]

March 28th, 2004

a sensual leg thing

i’ve gotten out of the habit of writing. this is not such a good thing. when i tell myself i’m going to sit down and write, i end up doing something incredibly stupid like playing typershark or something incredibly entertaining like listening to bad sex with bud kemp. i’ve thought lots of thoughts. i have [...]

March 28th, 2004

Scenes from a Notebook

I carry one notebook with me at a time. I use this notebook for most everything. Work, class, writing whatever comes to mind, phone numbers, random doodling, you name it, it goes into the notebook. I’ve been taking classes at the Loft Literary Center in Minneapolis for about ten months now. I’m in the midst [...]