i can’t fucking sleep. i’m blaming this solely on mother nature. the wind outside is howling in a most melodramatic fashion and it’s keep me awake. that cloud face with the pursed lips is perched right outside my window. i swear. i want to punch that cloud right in the nose. i have shit to [...]

since i hadn’t been outside since like 9 o’clock tuesday morning, i decided to venture out in the cold, dark unforgiving world today. only it wasn’t so cold, because it’s like 40 degrees out there. FORTY! i live in minnesota and it is december. i went outside without socks, do you have any idea how [...]

my westernerd friend, Wolfdog, just enlightened me about the existence of the Lite Brite Cube do you have any idea how very much i want this? i want this more than johnny depp and mocha mud pie ice cream combined.

i’ve slowly, ever so slowly, begun to put the christmas haul away. see, it has been living in the entryway since, well christmas, which i guess was only what? four days ago. so it really isn’t that bad. i think last year’s christmas haul stayed there until at least july. but i was getting tired [...]

i checked the mail and the e-mail. i ate some delicious peanut butter pancakes and put the dishes away. i think this totally calls for a nap. don’t you?

for someone who has done absolutely nothing all day, it’s sure taken me a damn long time to do it. it’s like 12:30 in the morning and i still don’t feel as though i’ve gotten all the nothing i had set out to do today done. it’s a damn shame. i did, however, get to [...]

since this is my week off from Hell, Inc., i had better get to the grocery store and stock up on supplies. but mostly i had to go because i was out of diet coke with lime and my heart was beating a little goofy and my hands were beginning to shake, because i hadn’t [...]

here’s what i want to know. i want to know why none of you bastards told me about tegan and sara. i’m sure you knew about the utter fabulousness of these two, someone had to know and nobody told me. i had to figure it out all on my own. what other secrets are you [...]

i’m frustrated. i’ve been so out of the habit of writing that everything i put down comes out awkward, clumsy, and not quite making a lot of sense. it’s driving me absolutely batty. i wish santa would have brought me a little bit of writing talent for christmas.
i was trying to write about how i [...]

it was the day before christmas and all through sister #2’s house not a creature was stirring because sister #2 and stink went to the packers game and the kidlings were across the way at Aunt Sherri and Uncle Wayne’s.
that left me there, waiting for the UPS man to deliver a final gift.
that left [...]

i fell asleep reading tom wolfe’s Stalking the Billion-Footed Beast and when i woke up, i discovered that i had the best bedhead ever. ever.

for lunch today i entered the fifth circle of hell, not to be confused with Hell, Inc. my place of employment, rather a wholly different kind of hell. the hell formerly known as the mall.
i had one more gift to get, though i thought i was done, i was wrong. so i ventured to [...]

and just like that i’m done. christmas cards are mailed, secret santa gift is mailed, and christmas shopping is done. god it feel good. now i just have to wrap, which is my favorite part.

if you don’t live in minnesota, you might not know that the entire world was turned into a skating rink last night. every last inch of the outside is coated with a fine sheen of ice. it’s like the glazed donut fairy got confused and decided to glaze minnesota.
after spending a good 20 minutes [...]

i’m a little excited by the upcoming christmas break. i get to take an entire ELEVEN DAYS IN A ROW off from Hell, Inc. ELEVEN! it’s going to give me some kinda good practice for unemployment. i can’t hardly wait.
of course i am focusing all my attention on the upcoming break and totally ignoring my [...]