so i’ve had this pathetic e-crush for like 94 years on a fellow westernerd. we all know that e-crushes are a close relative of a regular crush, but not quite the same. while regular crushes might seem dramatic, they’re like dinner theater. e-crushes are like desperate housewives or some other weird drama show i don’t [...]

Sister #4 told me tonight that she might be moving out. it seems when we talked finances the other night she finally realized that she’s living way beyond her means. apparently she talked about it all with Sister #3, and they decided it would be a good idea if she moves in with Sister #3 [...]

1. the easiest way into my pants is to be Mike Doughty
2. the second easiest way into my pants is to sing like Mike Doughty
3. the third easiest way into my pants is to have an unwavering belief in the utter gloriousness of Miike Doughty
4. the fourth easiest way, well i think once you get [...]

things are super hectice busy here in the land of copywriting and work. so busy that i’m pretty much ignoring most everyone in a futile attempt to get some stuff done. i just moaned to maria, “it’s one o’clock, i haven’t eaten lunch and i still haven’t gotten one thing done!” so then Al, the [...]

“i have a boyfriend,” jaycie, who is 8, announced.
“who is it?” sister #4 asked.
“booker, he’s so cute!” jaycie said.
“how do you know he’s your boyfriend?” sister #3 asked.
“because i like him,” jaycie said. “that’s what makes him my boyfriend.”
oh if only it were that easy.

each night before i go to bed, i make an effort to straighten out my covers. i shake out the duvet and make sure the stripes on it are vertical, just like me.
each morning when i wake up the stripes have some how magically moved to horizontal. i do not remember any of the [...]

the blech of the day followed me home. no amount of dancing without pants helped shake the crank. neither did sitting in the comfy green chair making fun of ice dancers and their head gear. the crank has taken root and left me pouty and searching for something to whine about. i’m currently going through [...]

i am trying so hard not to cry huge angry tears of sheer rage and outrage that my bottom lip is actually quivering of it’s own accord.

since Supergenius Headquarters have been declared a pants-free zone for the past few days, it seems my ass has been liberated. in its absolute delight over being freed from the tyranny of the pants, it seems my ass has decided today is the day where it will not be able to sit still for a [...]

sister #4 went off to south dakota yesterday to visit amandahugnkiss. today, she’s off dogsitting for my brother-in-law Tony’s parents. she’s not returning home until Tuesday. i’m so giddy with all this glorious alone time that i hardly know what to do. you can, however, bet your sweet ass while i contemplate what the hell [...]

class last night was utterly delightful and not just because kelly manage to make it to class or because it didn’t snow (and it had absolutely nothing with the vodo gracing us with his sweet, sweet presence at Grumpy’s after class). no, i thought it was utterly delightful due to the awesome discussions of the [...]

i am wearing three shirts, fingerless gloves, and a scarf, and yet i’m covered in goosebumps. it’s roughly 439 degrees below zero here in minnesota. i think it’s mother nature’s way of extracting pay for not snowing yesterday (thank you mother nature you made last night’s class that much better by not making me [...]

when you’re kinda freaked out that it might snow and you have to drive in it
when you’re kinda upset with yourself for being such a freak about the snow
when the left side of your throat is really hurty for reasons you can’t explain
when you burn your tongue on the hot tea you’re drinking to help [...]

my transformation to an old man is officially complete. i’ve gone from the kind of girl who spends her nights laying on the couch in her underpants reading comic books to the kind of girl who falls asleep in the chair watching tv.
for the past two nights i’ve been happily watching the olympics and the [...]

i’m in a meeting. i think i’ve been in a meeting since about noon yesterday. it’s a great meeting that productive, which doesn’t happen very often. of course my favorite thing about meetings are the tangential conversations, and the quotes that come out of them. herewith i present you, my meeting notes:
“i used to scrunch [...]