i am trying so hard not to cry huge angry tears of sheer rage and outrage that my bottom lip is actually quivering of it’s own accord.

i was at a party over the weekend where my friend monkey taught me a new phrase ’shredding a face melter.’ he was using it in reference to the faces that heavy-metal guitarist guys usually make when they are rocking out hardcore. i’ve decided that the phrase is absolutely perfect for the kind of toxic [...]

things are not going well here at supergenius headquarters. we’re in a funk. a deep icky, stinky funk that leaves us mostly impotent with some sort of weird rage of sorts. but it’s not really rage it’s more like apathy with a hint of rage, if that’s at all possible. it’s tough. of course most [...]

now that my rock and roll fantasy weekend is all over, real life has decided to rear its ugly head and come crashing in on all my daydreams. i totally hate when that happens (i also hate that the word totally has snuck into my vocabulary in the most annoying way possible). it’s frustrating having [...]

sometimes it’s really hard to write when the thing that’s playing biggest (TPoIWCS) on your mind is the one thing that you really cannot, should not write about. such self-censoring seems to clog up all the other things that you could still say, leaving you utterly pointless and emotionally constipated. it sorta sucks a giant [...]

it’s official i’m in a funk. i think the worries that i can’t talk about regarding the place of employment are really really bringing me down. totally bringing me down. there are big changes lurking here in the fortress of supergeniushood. big changes. big changes are scary and make you get lost in a deluge [...]

sometimes you have days that cannot be explained in mere words. today was one of those days. one of those days that tips your life over on its side and spins you upside down. big, big ASTRONOMICAL shake up at the place of employ. HUGE. HUGE. HUGE. but for the first time in a very [...]

phew. my heart is still racing, my palms are still a little sweaty, and i feel pretty good. despite what a lot of people i work with think, i don’t feel much like a natural leader. i can fight for what’s right, i can do what i’m told, i can even make decisions when it’s [...]

ok, well i just deleted an entire post that’d probably get me fired. but i feel a little better for getting it all out there. do you have any idea how much i hate that i have to censor myself. i live in some la-la-land where i get to say anything i want without repercussions.boo! [...]

for various and sundry reasons that aren’t clear to me, listening to The Smiths today is making me feel oddly calm. this is really quiote odd considering i’ve spent most of the day just raging against the machine in a really sort of simmering with anger sort of way that is probably quite unhealthy. but [...]

it happened, or it’s starting to happen. all that nonsense i was talking last week is coming to fruition. we had a HUGE shake up at work, that only affects my group. i am remaining skeptical about whether this change is a good or bad thing. but it’s a HUGE change, and that’s something that [...]

you know that something that’s gonna happen soon? well i wish it would fucking happen already because i’m bored. i know, i know. emotional upheaval on friday, boredom by tuesday. it’s the life of a person with ADD.
you know i’m sitting here with not a whole lot to do and i just keep sort of [...]

today’s another one of those days where if you were to talk about it you’d get fired for sure. it’s also the day where i’ve decided that developing a drinking problem might not be such a bad idea. all i know is that i plan on hitting the bottle the minute i get home.

it’s been one of those days. one of those days that starts being one of those days right away at nine in the morning the minute you look at your cell. it’s the kind of day that you can’t write about in too great of detail on your web site for fear of being fired. [...]

it’s monday again and i can’t stop smiling. i just sent an e-mail to my FFJ about how i feel so good about life right now in this very moment that i’ll probably get hit by a bus on the way home from work.
i have to actually bite my lower lip continuously so the smile [...]