an actual conversation from saturday afternoon, while drunk [this occured before the burnt lasagna and the movie marathon]
“you mean you could have just gone over there an had sex?” FFJ asked.
“yes,” i said.
“the sex was guaranteed?”
“uhuh.”
“man,” she said. “i can’t believe you turned down the booty call. what were you thinking?”
“i know! i wasn’t [...]

hi honey, i’m home. this is the glory that my eyes did have to witness everytime i looked out a window and/or looked up from a book. it was really a lot of work, my eyes are tired from all that looking at beauty. it was rough, but somebody had to do it. i feel [...]