Though she’d deny it with every breath in her body, FFJ is setting me up tonight. The thought of which, makes my stomach ache and gives me the feeling like I need to pee. But I dated a much-older-than-me man about 100 years ago and he told the 27-year-old me that I need to do [...]

so i’ve had this pathetic e-crush for like 94 years on a fellow westernerd. we all know that e-crushes are a close relative of a regular crush, but not quite the same. while regular crushes might seem dramatic, they’re like dinner theater. e-crushes are like desperate housewives or some other weird drama show i don’t [...]

like an archaeologist i keep digging through the strata in my life. however, unlike the archaeologist, the longer i dig the newer stuff i find. the old stuff i attack first, that’s easier. so long removed it’s hard to feel anything but warm nostalgia. but i realized everything from 1995 to the present can still [...]

way back when we used to be cool, Mel, ChiliD, and I used to play the island game. this was a game where you got to populate some tropical island with six to ten people you’d like to spend a lot of intimate time with. we had great gobs of fun playing the game, because [...]

i’m wearing old one-wired orangey today. i didn’t have the time or emotional fortitude to deal with anything else. i was up until 3:30 this morning talking on the phone with The Reporter — making any sort of morning decision making impossible.
there’s so much more i need to say, but i can’t seem to [...]

tonight after practicing, something that will surely make me go blind, i got thinking. this a bad thing. after practice one should just roll over and go to sleep, one should not think. thinking just gets everyone into trouble. but tonight the thinking invaded before the sleep could come.
i was thinking about the number of [...]

when youre in the process of getting the karmic shit beat out of you, the universe throws you a few bones, just to remind you that stuffing your head in the oven is not a good idea. because, it’s all about balance right?
so after having an utterly fabulous lunch with FFJ that invovled cream cheese [...]

well, we’ve made it through the long, dark lonely night into the cool dark lonely morning. there was a monsoon that hit Prior Lake last night and that was kinda nice. it rained so hard and dramatically that i’m surprised the sidewalk isn’t dented.
so yes, made it through the night. still a little weepy-eyed [...]

during all my napping, birthday partying, laundry-avoiding, and book reading, i’ve managed to watch Before Sunset three times this weekend. i think it’s official, i’m in love. i thought i was in love with Before Sunrise but i see now my feelings for that movie was nothing more than a schoolgirl crush.
Before Sunset is the [...]

a year ago today, i got an e-mail from a tall, tall handsome man who had seen a personal ad i had on citypages.com. i placed the ad in a fit of “i’m gonna be fucking happy if it kills me” that possessed me shortly after the entire outlaw debacle. a debacle that still makes [...]

I’m going to a wedding this afternoon. I just painted my toenails in honor of the occasion. Once we get to the church, I plan on painting a smile on my face too.
I love weddings - the pomp and circumstance, the big tacky dresses, the flowers, I love it all. Weddings always make me [...]

a smile with your name on it is guaranteed if you:
1. leave a message on my voice mail
2. text message me on sara the swanky cell phone
3. say “i was just thinking about you” or “i did/saw/heard ____ and thought of you.”
4. talk to me about a great book you read
6. talk to me about [...]

remember that episode of the brady bunch where cindy ran around chanting “i’ve got a secret, i’ve got a secret?” that’s sort of how i am today. i’ve got a secret smile and i can’t seem to wipe the smug grin off my face. i’m distracted and don’t feel like paying attention to the people [...]

so i just asked my fabulous friend jodie about the oddness of someone not giving me his e-mail address after i asked for it. i mean, i have his phone number but he refuses to give me his e-mail addy. is that just weird? because i give my e-mail address to just about anyone who [...]

you will be happy to know that i’ve figured out how to get the assy taste of cold-eze out your mouth. . . chocolate chip cookies. it’s the only thing that worked– and i had onions, peppers, zucchini and other such stinky things for dinner.
in other news, we’re really happy for the delete key tonight. [...]